Been thinkin

So many marriages crumbling. Husbands and wives deciding its better to be apart than together. And based on statistics, it matters not the length of the union, culture, race, religion or children.

Most often it is the children that suffer. They are resilient, but they suffer the loss of trust: parents promise to nurture and love them. They deny the break up. They grieve the death. And finally, as long as the parents remember they are divorcing each other not the children, they accept the division, moving on with their own lives. Reality: children, young or adult, do not always get over the divorce of their parents. Sometimes they imitate one of those parents.
Truth: divorce hurts each family member, but you must rise and soar above the pain.

Simultaneously, one spouse also suffers. They grieve the break up wondering what the other is doing. Angry the other has moved on: soared above the pain–and they wonder should I have stuck it out. Or they say I am better off without him or her. All that I’ve wanted to do I will do or not. It becomes sweet liberation. As one divorce woman of six years says, “you look around and see that you’ve been sitting in the dark and turn the light on.”

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