A few weeks earlier I posted the question: What age does a man start looking for a wife? And what age does a woman stop looking for a husband? A few responses: at birth, age two, 25, 50, and 55.
Based on those responses and my research, a concrete or theoretical answer does not exist. Especially, since both men and women love and need each other differently and at varied times. Some do not realize the need for companionship: stability, honesty and intimacy –physical, emotional, financial, and spiritual– until much later in life; while others grab hold of a companion quickly and earnestly survive the relationship battleground. For example, I attended a funeral and the obituary stated the deceased had married her husband in 1958. And there he sat in the front pew of the church lamenting the loss of his beloved. Despite the melees in their 53 years together, the obituary and the photo collage illustrated two people who survived the external woes of togetherness.
First and foremost, falling in love and being in love are not the same. I’m sure if I fall in love, then I can easily fall out of love. (Been there done that. You know it’s true.) However, being in love is a conscience existence to be present– physically, emotionally, financially, and spiritually.
And an armored relationship– marriage or cohabitation—remains strong when two people are friends, do not compete against each other, grow individually as well as collectively, manage not solve problems, and fix things not each other.
I don’t have an answer; I’ve been single, married, divorced, now single again. And during the last few months, I’ve encountered men and women who have been married more than once, sometimes three times. And people—in their 40s and 50s- who have remained alone and single.
I’m just wondering why men are looking for wives and women are not looking for husbands?
I’m just sayin’…
And the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” . . . So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, He took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib (side) he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man (Gen 2:18, 21 22).